Because It Is Painful To Keep Sitting On Fence

Dr. Nima Rahmany
3 min readMar 6, 2022


Everyone wants change.

That moment when we look at the quality of our lives, our relationships, our sense of purpose… and we might even feel hurt from what has happened in our past.
Abandonment. Shame. Resentment.
Add to it, what’s happening in the world right now…
The feelings can feel so overwhelming it just sometimes feels safer to just check out.

To numb.
To not have to feel.

Because it’s painful and scary to “go there.”

I can’t begin to count how many times I get DM’s from people in this community DESPERATE to change…

Until the very moment there is a choice to be made to change.

Then it happens.

The “Freeze” response.

It’s like a paralyzing weight that is so heavy we feel like we can’t breathe or move.

That’s the Nervous System, trying to keep us safe in the familiar.

Where you might KNOW that “enough’s enough, I gotta deal with what I’ve been avoiding. I can’t live being run by my attachment traumas anymore. I can’t keep having the same argument again and again…. I can’t keep dating the same person… SOMETHING HAS GOTTA GIVE….”

But then the fear takes over. And all the commitments, all the intentions, all the promises we make to ourselves get thrown out the window, and we abandon ourselves once again.

Breaking this Cycle is not easy.
That’s because the limitation isn’t in our mind.
It’s in our body.

The participants who attend our events realize this RIGHT AWAY.

This is different.
It’s deeper.

We go WAAAAAAY deeper than the surface,
because the only way to heal is to actually take the risk,
meet the fear head-on, lean in, and declare that you deserve more.

You deserve to feel secure in a relationship.
You deserve to experience love that is not transactional.
You deserve to find out where these patterns have come from,
and yes you deserve to learn how to be the one to break the cycle.

When you do, you shift your relationship with fear itself.
When you do, you begin to trust yourself.
And you begin to see the world start to treat you with the same reverence and acknowledgement that you’ve finally given yourself. You feel worthy and deserving of love…

Because you’ve already invested the time, resources, care, and attention on healing yourself.

If you’ve been here lurking, watching videos and reading posts… maybe completed the attachment style survey or watched the masterclass, or listened to the podcast and “heard” about truly doing the work… and you’re sitting on the fence …

Here’s an opportunity for you to take action.
Without action there are no results.

This is a post from — Jen Rudolph after lurking for a year, FINALLY took action and produced dramatic results in healing her anxious attachment.

She began where many do… At our Overview Experience.
We get to deep dive and access parts that many do YEARS of therapy spending thousands of dollars don’t reach.

If you’re finally ready to get to the root cause of the conflict and turmoil that keeps repeating in your relationships and learn how to break the cycle and learn a tool that you can use to turn your triggers into deeper self love, and conflict into deeper intimacy, then the invitation is to get OFF the fence and jump in and join a community of Cyclebreakers who are learning how to heal in a time when we all need it the most.



Dr. Nima Rahmany

Dr. Nima Rahmany is a retired Chiropractor and interpersonal trauma specialist studying and teaching principles of healing mind and body.