What’s Hiding Underneath It All

Dr. Nima Rahmany
2 min readApr 6, 2022

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Imagine what it would be like to be a child,
who every time he/she has big emotions,
or challenges in life — and in response,
their mother/father gets triggered, upset, and reactive,
covering up loads of mom/dad guilt they are unable to regulate,
and then as a result,

suppress, judge, shame, or invalidate that child…

What do you think the result is?

The child doesn’t end up hating the parents for this.

They child ends up judging and separating from themselves.

Even though most wouldn’t consider this “Trauma with a big T,”
what we know is that having our “shadow” emotions invalidated as a child,
or judged is a form of “gaslighting” that causes us to gaslight ourselves.

This has been passed down from generation to generation.

When we don’t solve the root of this and break the cycle,
we pass that same invalidation to our children,
because really we’re doing it to ourselves all our lives.

We then “parent” ourselves the way we were parented,
making our feelings wrong and beating ourselves up for not being perfect.
This is one of the insidious vehicles for trauma to
pass down from one generation to another,
causing mental health problems,
relationship disasters,
lack of self esteem,
health issues…

Because truly — how can we be healthy when we are constantly at war within ourselves?

When you solve what this is really about,
learn to regulate your own Autonomic Nervous System,

that self abandonment turns to self trust.
Confidence rises.
You’re able to self-soothe,
and not need others to validate what’s been missing inside.

Relationships then turn from insecure to secure,
to match the secure attachment we have within ourselves.

Being a Cyclebreaker isn’t easy.

You have to be willing — not only to do the work,
but to make the relationship with yourself your number 1 priority.

When you do, your entire universe changes.
Consider the possibility you’re here because you were called to break the generational cycles in your family line.
For that reason, to navigate this challenging road, it’s wise to find a guide and community to help
when things get murky (because they definitely will).
If you’re on the fence about jumping in and learning how to dismantle all of this, or feeling overwhelmed by it all…
Imagine 40 years ago if your mother/father was on the fence and considering making the leap…

What if they were able to overcome their overwhelm, fear, and excuses and do the work?

How would your life experience have been different?

Here’s your chance now.

See you at our next event (Breathwork and Badassery or The Overview Experience)

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Dr. Nima Rahmany
Dr. Nima Rahmany

Written by Dr. Nima Rahmany

Dr. Nima Rahmany is a retired Chiropractor and interpersonal trauma specialist studying and teaching principles of healing mind and body.

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