Will This Work For Me ??
I wish I could have a nickel
for everyone who has reached out wondering
if our events and programs will “work” for them.
Some of them request a guarantee from me that it will,
and don’t feel safe in proceeding unless there is one.
It’s almost as if they feel so duped by all the things they’ve tried
to break the deeply conditioned patterns
that have them
- Choosing partners they KNOW aren’t good for them
- repeating the same arguments,
- feeling sad, lonely, anxious and in DEEP emotional pain.
“Why hasn’t anything WORKED for me???”
We have been conditioned to seek out pain relievers.
Which makes perfect sense, because emotional pain sucks.
What we don’t see in the background of this game
is that we are setting ourselves up to lose.
Because in our endless search for pain relief,
we become trapped in our addictions
so that we can avoid feeling our pain.
When we don’t get to the CAUSE of the pain,
(often Trauma Bonds and Self-Abandonment from Childhood Adversity)
and work to heal the ROOT of it
(The wounded child inside of us)
and finally master the practice of reconnecting a bond that has been broken…
To face it, to feel it, to INTEGRATE it,
which basically means to take it all in as a PART of us
instead of trying to dismiss, deny, abandon, or shame it…
If we DON’T address it…
Then the pain keeps chasing US.
When you finally stop looking for pain relievers,
and become more proficient at FEELING,
something magical happens.
We feel lighter, more grounded, and human again.
When we surrender to the PROCESS instead,
We learn skills to adapt and HEAL rather than just COPE.
Rather than expecting a program/guide that offers a SOLUTION to END pain,
which sets us up to lose because life involves having a relationship TO pain…
it’s wiser to look for a PROCESS to help you become more resilient and adaptable
to the pain of emotional flashbacks which are a part of life….
And COMMIT to learning the rules of the game.
When this happens, you learn the language of the Nervous System.
Your capacity to feel discomfort expands.
You begin to heal.
Healing is learning,
and learning is forgetting.
So might as well master a process YOU CAN WORK to heal,
rather than expecting something is going to work FOR YOU.
Choose wisely, my friend.
I GUARANTEE if you don’t,
you’ll forever be looking for something that “works for you”
But when you do,
You’ll make incremental progress on your healing,
and you’ll take the tools with you for life.
If you’re ready to learn the process,
watch the video below and see what I’m talking about.
Your biggest supporter (and butt kicker)