Your Child In A Trigger-Proof Relationship

Dominic hated swimming.

At 4 years old, the idea of going underwater terrified him.
Every mention of the pool would lead to tears, protests, and a hard “no.”

As parents, Diana and I found ourselves in a dilemma.

Diana, as his safe space,
wanted to respect his boundaries and avoid pushing him into fear.

But something didn’t sit right with me.

I couldn’t shake the thought:
If we don’t nudge him out of his comfort zone, he’ll never grow.

TENDING TO CAPACITY vs. EXPANDING CAPACITY

In life and relationships, we face a delicate balance:

• Tending to capacity: Respecting our limits,
resting when needed, and knowing when to pause.

• Expanding capacity: Pushing ourselves into discomfort, growth,
and challenge to unlock new levels of confidence and connection.
(Think of working out or training for a marathon).

Both are critical.

But if we only “tend to capacity” without expanding it, we stay stuck.

This is the trap many people fall into in their relationships:

• They sit in the safety of therapy or coaching that validates their feelings
but never challenges them to grow.

• They stay stuck in the anxious-avoidant cycle,
waiting for their partner to change.

• They remain in the same stories,
never pushing past the boundaries of their current emotional world.

This isn’t just about avoiding discomfort — IT’S ABOUT AVOIDING GROWTH.

DOMZY’S BIG MOMENT

This weekend, Dominic resisted the pool again.
But after some reassurance,
I got him to agree to come with me and Uncle Russ and his grandson, Angus.

We started small — splashing in the kiddie pool.

Then, when the moment felt right, I invited him into the big pool.

He was scared.

His little body was stiff with fear.

But I held him, guided him,
and showed him how to kick and float with a pool noodle.

At first, he clung to me, begging me not to let go.

But slowly, with deep breaths and gentle encouragement, he relaxed.

And then, the magic happened.

I let go.

At first, he panicked. “Don’t let me go!”

“It’s okay, buddy. Breathe. Trust yourself — you’ll float.”

And then, something clicked.

He was swimming.

He beamed with pride, shouting, “I’m swimming by myself!”

It was a huge leap for a boy who had sworn he’d never swim.

THE LESSON IN RELATIONSHIPS

Watching Dominic expand his capacity reminded me of all the people stuck in insecure relationship patterns.

• The anxious partner who can’t stop chasing validation.
• The avoidant partner who pulls away at the first sign of vulnerability.
• The push-pull dynamics that leave both people drained, frustrated, and disconnected.

Most stay stuck here because they focus only on TENDING to capacity:

• Therapy that validates their emotions but doesn’t challenge them to grow.
• Support that feels comforting but keeps them in the same victim narrative.
• Avoiding triggers instead of learning to navigate them.

While tending to capacity has its place, it won’t make you Trigger-Proof.

Becoming Trigger-Proof requires EXPANDING your capacity:

• To feel discomfort and not run from it.
• To take ownership of your role in the dynamic.
• To lean into growth, even when it feels scary or unfamiliar.

Just like Dominic discovered he could swim, imagine what’s possible for you when you expand your capacity:

• You stop chasing or avoiding your partner’s moods.
• You feel grounded, confident, and secure — even when conflict arises.
• Your relationships become a source of connection, not chaos.
• You create a foundation of self-worth that attracts secure, loving partnerships.

Best of all, you raise children with that same capacity to face and feel challenging situations,
conversations, and emotions because they have YOU as their example.

Your child, like Dominic did this weekend will THRIVE in a Trigger-Proof relationship.

It’s the greatest gift we can give our children: the capacity to discern between
TENDING to capacity and EXPANDING capacity.

Possibility is limited only by our capacity.

It’s about time you gave yourself permission to EXPAND.

Your wingman on the adventure,
Nima

PS.

If this post resonates, my invitation is for you to Imagine what 2025 could look like
if you gave yourself permission to expand your capacity —
to show up as your secure, magnetic,
non-reactive, authentic self in every relationship.

No more chasing, avoiding, or shrinking.
No more fawning and people pleasing.
No more hiding behind shame to avoid being “the bad guy”.

Just calm confidence, deep connection,
and a foundation of self-worth that transforms your relationships
and sets the example for your children.

This Black Friday, I’m offering $4,500 worth of training, live coaching,
and personal guidance for under $400 —
but only for those who are first in line and ready to expand their capacity.
This opportunity is for those willing to be lovingly challenged in a boundaried,
masculine container that will hold you accountable to your growth.

If that’s you, reply with “Send me the details”
and I’ll send you this private offer for those who want to create a Trigger-Proof relationship
and make 2025 the year to break the cycle — and expand into what’s possible.